I found a little something in all three Scripture readings today. First, in Paul’s letter to the Ephesians, he reminds me of our connectedness. Wherever we go…when we are among others who believe and declare Jesus as God’s Son and trust in Him for their forgiveness and salvation…these are our brothers and sisters. We are connected in a way that surpasses blood relationships. Our very essence…our spirits…are connected and interwoven and united. And so while it can be challenging for someone more introverted like me to feel comfortable in a new group of people, I need to remember that when I am among believers, I am at home…I am safe. No place else will God’s spirit reach me as openly and effectively as among His children. He can move most freely among His people…and so I should not go reluctant or hesitant because of new faces…but rather eager because of God’s presence.
The second reading…the Responsorial Psalm…just stirred me with its poetic imagery. I love the picture of the fullness of Creation forever resounding with praise to God…always echoing for us His Love and Grace and Mercy.
Day pours out the word to day,
and night to night imparts knowledge.
But I must admit the original Psalm itself is even more moving in its depiction of Nature forever whispering the Love and Majesty of Our God.
The heavens declare the glory of God; the sky proclaims its builder’s craft.
One day to the next conveys that message; one night to the next imparts that knowledge.
There is no word or sound; no voice is heard;
Yet their report goes forth through all the earth, their message, to the ends of the world. Psalm 19:2-5
Though there is no audible word or perceivable sound, God’s Truth reverberates through all Creation…through us….into us. Despite so many denying that Truth…or so polluted that they can’t feel it…it touches us all. God’s constant reminder that He is in control, that He loves us, and that all is His.
The third reading is a lesson in decision making…one I still struggle to apply. The time has come for Jesus to choose the 12. It doesn’t say how many disciples he had at that point to choose from, but regardless, Jesus obviously needed to discern who the 12 would be. And so despite His “natural” gifts of wisdom and intelligence, despite the gut feeling He probably had, He refused to make a decision without praying first. Once more, He didn’t throw up a quick prayer, “Father, guide my decision. Amen.” and then simply act on his own instincts. No, Jesus sought the Father. He prayed…and waited on God for a response. He prayed fervently I am sure…but also patiently. He prayed all night. Can you imagine…working all day, knowing you have a big decision coming up, feeling its weight on you, and then getting to the end of your day and deciding not to get some rest…not to sleep, but instead pray…and pray all night…because it is THAT important.
Jesus refused to move…to take a step…until He knew what God wanted. I don’t know how much clearer God can be in laying out how we are…and how I am…to make decisions. Seek Him…seek His will…find out His desire…search out His plan. And then…only then…do I move. I find it really difficult sometimes…many times…just waiting. I want to make a decision…especially a big decision…and have it done. Of course I do my research…analyze the situation…think about it nearly non-stop. I generally am not rash in my decisions. (Many would say I over analyze things.) The problem is…that once I feel like I have an answer…I want to move forward. So waiting on God…waiting on the definitive yeah-that’s-what-God-wants feeling…it is a real challenge for me. Or sometimes it is the opposite. The decision is so big with so many potential consequences….that I keep waiting…ignoring that sense inside of me telling me that I already know the answer….and instead apparently waiting for some miraculous vision or a direct message from one of God’s Angels. I am so afraid of making a misstep that I don’t move at all. Either way…perhaps if I simply committed to prayer…and continued praying until I had an answer…making these big decisions would be less stressful…and more faith building. After all, if it was good enough…and important enough…for Jesus, then it is certainly good enough for me.